A couple months ago I listened to a speech about “negative thought.” She said that we have somewhere around 15,000-60,000 thoughts each day, and about 80% of those thoughts are negative. 80 PERCENT!!!! I of course immediately denied that I would fit into this statistic. Then I started paying more attention to what was going on in my head. Every time a negative thought popped in, I took note.
What I came to discover is that, if someone was able to hear my thoughts, they wouldn’t care for me much, and they would be terribly bored. Day after day, I think about specific events that upset me, like a broken record. The most common topic to come into my mind is the feeling of frustration, mostly by the actions of other people, or lack of actions. When I investigated this farther, I realized that these are almost always referring to specific situations that I’m too chicken to approach the person about. So, I get angrier and angrier that they wont change their behavior. The bottom line is that this anger is mine. The reason they won’t change their behavior is most frequently because I never asked them to! – So, I need to either let it go, or deal with it like a mature adult.
The other common negative thoughts are often fleeting, while driving, or waiting in line. Small miscellaneous actions other people have made, that simply annoy me. Sometimes they are shame related (i.e. I’m not good enough, will other people judge me if I do/say this? Etc)
I also find myself the most short-tempered at work, where I have the most stresses and with family, whom I’m most comfortable with.
The reason I’m sharing this is because I’m making it my New Years resolution to knock negativity down to 10% or less. Those who go through life with positive attitudes and aren’t secretly judging, are probably the most enlightened, they see that our thoughts are not who we are, and understand that every person is an important part of the collective. I can grasp these ideas, but will have to reprogram my brain in order to live them fully. Wish me luck!